9:10am In case you didn’t notice, I skipped right over social break day eight. I don’t blame you, I almost didn’t notice!
And that is saying something! I used to check social media like I used to smoke cigarettes — which is to say, a lot. And now, this week, I sailed right through day eight as if social media didn’t even exist!
Contrary to what you might think, my first thought wasn’t pride of my accomplishment. My first thought was one of fear and disappointment. It went kind of like this:
“Well, shit. This experiment is over. There’s nothing to write about.”
You see if I’m successfully off social media and it’s no big deal, there’s no entertainment value in documenting my experience. Is there?
I don’t know yet if that is true or not but I’ve enjoyed developing a heightened awareness of what I’m learning from my prolonged absence from social media so I’m going to press on into the experiment. I notice that I’m experiencing other aha moments that might also be valuable to you. I hope you’ll continue to follow along?
For example, after reading a few chapters in Soulful Simplicity (which I’m really enjoying, btw) the other night, I woke to my 5:30am alarm, turned it off and blissfully went back to sleep.
You see, there was a clear message in my head that said, “You need to remember to trust yourself.” And in that inexplicable pre-dawn knowing that only comes when you’re on the precipice of asleep and awake, I knew that trust had to start by trusting my body to know when to wake up instead of relying on an alarm clock.
This may sound weird to you. I’m reading what I’m saying and it sounds weird to me. So if you’re in Camp WTF, its okay. I’m there too. Stay with me.
If you’ve been following along for a while, you may know that I’m in the midst of a season of burn out. I can’t say how long I’ve been here, what stage I’m in, or when this is going to conclude but if you’ve even been in a season of burn out, you may recognize the darkness, doubt, and heaviness that’s typically baggage on this journey.
Point is, in that pre-dawn moment I was able to clearly see my over-reliance on schedules, alarms, and appointments that were meant to be holding me accountable to what I said I wanted but really were contributing to the pressure of an overfull schedule and overcommitment to things that were making me feel anxious and resentful.
In that moment I realized that somewhere along the way, I got caught up in the over-complication of the tools that were meant to support me. I lost sight of the forest for the trees.
And so I simply turned off my alarm. And slept.
And you know what?! My body knew when to wake up! My body knew when it was time to start the day! It didn’t let me down. Not a single person died nor did any work or clients fall through the cracks as my overactive mind would’ve had me believe.
And it made a world of difference to wake up feeling peaceful and rested instead of feeling like I was already late-for-life that usually happens when the alarm goes off -- feeling pressured along with a corresponding flood of cortisol and adrenaline is no way to start a day.
I also recognize that this “no alarm” experiment may be easier for me than others since I:
A. don’t have young children and
B. work for myself
But, even if you find yourself a parent to 17 kids — did you know that Geraldo Rivera’s Father was the oldest of 17?! WTF?! — or working an inhuman amount of hours — shout out to all the tax preparers surviving tax season! — what CAN you do to decrease scheduling pressure and increase your self trust?
P.S. Do you want to continue to hear from me even if the social break series goes drama-free? If so, what would you like to hear/explore/discover first?